Color Me Gone, or Maybe Just Use White Correction Fluid
You’ll notice I’m gone. Refresh the header if you don’t believe me.
I’m gone. That’s right gone. If you ever want to see me again, you’ll have to pay up.
You see, today is the last day of the month, and I’m trying to earn just a little bit more to push my earnings over to the next level. I’m just short of a nice numerical figure.
So, I’m holding myself hostage is what may be the lamest way ever to try to earn a little bit of extra money quickly online.
It is currently just a little after 5:00 p.m. EST. You have until the clock strikes midnight to pay ransom if you ever want to see me again.
Send $1.00 via PayPal and, if I get enough dough before midnight, I’ll be back. If not, you risk never ever seeing me again.
Oh, but you will get some value for your money. Everyone who sends a buck will be included in a special viral story! And, I’ll give you a link on my forthcoming new blog as well. Story (with a link) and a link on a second blog, plus you get to see me again. Maybe. The first two are a guarantee; the third depends upon how much dough comes in. That’s not a bad deal for $1.00.
Act now! The clock is ticking!
Did you have a vision brother Rinnert? Is God calling you home if you don’t raise _____ ?
So you were educated at Oral Roberts university- were you?
I saw John Chow on here earlier why don’t you ask him for a buck or two. Or some Agloco bucks or cuckoo bucks or whatever it is he has going on now… ahh I like John I saw him in Vegas in February- he’s okay sort of.
I’ll give you a dollar if you stop using the term vintage in any further postings from now until eternity. You have until midnight to decide.
O Sister Michelle, we cannot abide by petty promises for all of eternity, especially not to forbid the use of the wonderful God-inspired words of the English language. Vintage, what a term it is for the ages, combining vinum meaning grapes and age meaning old, and who doesn’t like old grapes? How couldest thee expecteth anyone to never again refer to the bountiful grapes which age with grace and dignity, that are but God’s creation and to be inspiring to us? How can we sign away our God-given liberties of life and speech and never speaketh again of the old grapes? Would you not worry about the wrath of said grapes? O Sister Michelle, but the old grapes do not have wrath. God alone has wrath, along with women scorned, but doth a woman scorned not appreciate a good old grape now and again? How so shall we sign away our rights to use such lofty terms, such a vintage, for a mere dollar, which amounts to 67 cents after PayPal takes their cut, which is worth even less due to the fall of the dollar and the lack of a gold standard upon which our fair currency used to be based? O, no, Sister Michelle, I must respectfully decline your offer.
I read your response as if it were a Monty Python skit. Very funny.
See, I told you so!
I gave you a dollar because the thought of making a $1 paypal transaction was funny to me. I dunno, maybe it’s just me.
Maybe because PayPal keeps 1/3 of it.
Thanks!
That totally blows. It makes me want to send another 33 cents, but then I’d have to send 44 cents to cover their cut. Or something.
Well, let’s do some algebra.
x - (.33 * x) = 33
1 - .33 = 33/x
.67 = 33/x
.67x = 33
x = 33/.67
x = 49.25
So you would have to send me 50 cents and then PayPal would keep 17 cents, leaving me with 33 cents.
And, who says you never use algebra in real life?
…. so if I send in a million dollars, I get 2 million links and I become famous on the blogoshere wheel of fortune??
OR, I could send in a Bundt Cake with coconut in the middle. Both are good, but would I still get 2 million links?
ps …. no Visa is required to fly into Hollydale International Airport, but you have to walk through the X-Ray machine.
For a million dollars, you get a link on every blog and website I currently own that has links to other sites. That is far short of 2 million links, but I’ll also buy you an ad on JohnChow.com. Heck, I’ll put two ads up for you. I’ll buy a review for you too, and ask that John Chow personally write it. Then, I will also buy a review for you on Michael Kwan’s blog. Then, you will be famous on the blogosphere wheel of fortune. At least for a day or two. After that, it’s up to you to maintain the fame. I’ll just get you there. You have to keep yourself there.
That’s pretty good deal, and you still walk away with nearly 1mil. nice.
I think it’s a great deal. For Speedcat, I’ll even extend the deadline to Monday night. Gives him the weekend to fill the suitcase with cash and send it out to me. Or, I’ll take a cashier’s check. I’ll also accept gold or silver bullion. I’ll even take a payment option. He can spread payments over a year with no interest charges. Just $833,333.33 per month. That even saves him 4 cents. I’m generous like that.
[...] my shameless link sale on the last day, and Pete for taking advantage of the offer, that pushed my earnings over one threshold. I think I [...]