To the regular readers of my blog, this post is not directed at you. This post is directed at the spammers. If you’re a regular, do not comment on this post. This is going to be one of my honeypot posts. That is, if anyone leaves a comment, such as “Wow! Great post! I would like to read more. I have bookmarked your blog. Thanks.” then I will instantly know the commenter is a spammer, a.k.a. moron. This post has no real value whatsoever and, if you are a human being reading this, you will know not to leave a comment. Okay?

Many bloggers have apparently been suffering a rash of comment spam lately. Can’t say that I’ve noticed any measurable increase, but Akismet does a pretty good job of catching them, so I don’t notice. Akismet deletes them too, so I never even have to see most of them. Sure, some slip through but no biggie really. Anyway, on to the post for the morons…

Dear Morons,

First off, this is a blog. This is not a forum. So, if you leave a comment greeting the other forum members and expressing your joy at becoming a member of this forum, you are a moron. Either that or an automated piece of software, in which case the person on whose behalf you are spamming is a moron.

Next, do not leave a comment on this post. I am giving you fair warning not to comment on this post. If you do comment on this post, especially if you leave a comment saying how useful this post was, then I will know you didn’t read this post and that you are a moron. Either that, or you are a bot, in which case, once again, the person on whose behalf you are spamming the Internet is a moron.

Third, do not leave a comment on this post. Seriously. I am mentioning this twice. Three times if you count the preface to my regular readers at the beginning of this post. Thus, if you follow through and leave a comment on this post, you are a moron.

In fact, I had titled this post “Dear Morons” but I have just now changed the title to “Dear Morons (do not comment on this post)” so now you have absolutely no reason to comment on this post. If you do, you are a moron. If you leave a comment, you will be marked as a spammer, your comment will be deleted, and you’ll probably wind up on Akismet’s blacklist. On top of that, you could become prematurely bald, your family jewels may wither and fall off and your aura might turn a greenish shade of black. So, I am giving you fair warning: DO NOT COMMENT ON THIS POST.

Really. Can I make it any clearer for you? If you comment on this post, you are a moron. Here, I’ll do it also in italics so you cannot miss it. If you comment on this post, you are a moron.

Finally, if you are a real person reading this and you’re spamming blogs indiscriminately because some marketing “genius” told you that’s how to market your product online and make money, stop it. Ask yourself how much money you’ve really made by spamming the Internet and pretty much incurring the wrath and undying hatred of bloggers everywhere? If you’re not making the money you thought you would, it’s time to stop listening to those people that advise you to build your web business on spam. Instead, you should check out my course, The Internet Marketing Backstage Pass, where you’ll learn the right ways to build and market your online business.

Or, you can continue being a moron and leaving spam comment after spam comment, which will end up being deleted, and see little to no gain out of your efforts. Or the efforts of your little spam bot.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 8th, 2009 at 12:00 pm and is filed under Blogging. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
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